We all come across circumstances that trigger us, make us overthink or cause emotional discomfort most of the time. In such situations, we tend to reach out to our friends and try to relieve ourselves of the anger, resentment and tensions weighing us down.
However, there are a lot of times when we are not mindful of the other person’s state of mind and aggressively start pouring on them emotions that might affect them severely. This coping mechanism is popularly known as emotional dumping and, spoiler alert, it might not be a healthy coping mechanism.
Read below to figure out how to identify signs of emotional dumping and how to turn that toxic venting into a healthy coping mechanism known as healthy venting.
What is emotional dumping?
One of the defining features of emotional dumping is ranting and dumping with no accountability. No regard is paid to the person listening to the rant and more often, the process is non-consensual on the part of the listener. It becomes extremely toxic as the person who is emotional dumping is often not in the head-space to any constructive remark or advice. The whole process leaves no scope for resolution.
How is healthy venting different from emotional dumping?
- Unlike emotional dumping, a process of healthy venting involves the active participation of both the listener and the speaker, who come together to process the emotion.
- The process involves active listening, where the listener contributes tangibly by asking open-ended questions and letting the person know that they are being heard and their feelings are validated.
- There is a greater scope of self-realization in the process of healthy venting as it is mutual as well as solution focused.
Effective ways to practice healthy venting
#1. Communication
It is important that both the parties involved in the process of venting communicate well. Miscommunication often leads to failed expectations and further add on to the pre-existing negative emotions. This not only affects the mental health of the person sharing but also of the person listening to them.
#2. Take time to process the emotion on a personal level first
Most of the time when we have the urge to vent we end up redirecting our anger on the person listening to us. This transcends the personal boundary of that person. This not only hampers your well being but also puts off the other person as well, thus affecting your relationship with them in the longer run.
#3. Figure out what’s bothering you
The main purpose of any healthy coping mechanism is to come up with a solution to the issue that has been troubling you. To achieve this with healthy venting, the initial step would be waiting for the anger to subside is important. Once you do that, it becomes easier for you to point out what exactly is troubling you. Reaching someone out with this sense of awareness helps the both of you to understand the situation better and come up with a resolution rather than waiting for the listener to magically end your misery.
#4. Journaling
Venting, as opposed to what is normally believed, doesn’t necessarily have to involve another person. To not let negative emotions bottle up and to process the situation, you can also inculcate the habit of journaling. Writing down what is bothering you gives you a clearer perspective. The process of writing also allows your body and mind to calm down so that you can carry on with the day with no baggage.
#5. Seek professional help
Gone are the days when seeking the help of mental health specialists were considered taboo. The importance of going to therapy is not very alien to us. Our mind is a complex part of us and sometimes we do need the help of a specialist to unravel this complexity and live a more stress-free life. A session of healthy venting with a therapist on The Wellness Corner app can help you significantly and bring better and more long-lasting results.